Alcohol’s this HUGE thing – we’ve even built our society around it for goodness sake.
But not everybody realises how manipulated we’ve become. Manipulated into thinking that drinking alcohol’s just as fundamental to life as water is.
When we drink too much alcohol, everybody seems to join in with us. Everyone does the same: drink, laugh and have fun. At first.
But what we don’t realise is that NOBODY is actually doing the same as we are.
Because we’re 100% alone with our relationship with alcohol. Together at a party, but alone within the relationship.
That means we have an individual relationship that nobody else can share with us. All those people who cheer us on, that’s just because they believe they’re having fun.
They might not be drinking half of the amount that we drink in a day.
They might only drink on odd occasions or they might be drinking for 12 hours a day.
Whatever their relationship with alcohol, it has nothing to do with how we drink.
And it has NOTHING to do with how they think about us.
Repeat?
Our relationship has nothing to do with how other people think of us.
We have to think about ourselves. Nobody else is going to step into our life and sort us out.
When we agree to become best friends with alcohol or even married to alcohol, maybe the time’s come (probably already years before) to look for separation or divorce.
The problem is, nobody around us is going to tell us this, and if they did, let’s be honest, we wouldn’t listen.
The people who do tell us are the ones we don’t hang out with anyway – the ones who aren’t in on the fun.
So what would they know about it anyway, right?
What do I Know About Giving Up Alcohol?
I spent all my life until I was in my late forties believing that alcohol was the best way to have fun.
We got drunk. We laughed. We got very drunk. We fell over. We argued. We talked bullshit. All the things you do when you’re drunk. I’ve done them all.
And that’s ok (maybe).
But it isn’t ok is when alcohol puts your life in danger, takes away your health, your time, your commitment, your relationship, your fitness, your youth, your tact, your quality of life, your better judgement, your wellbeing . . .
I was one of those people who get home from work and crack open a bottle of wine. Because it’s time for a drink, right?
It took me years to wake up.
And I had many wake-up calls. Accidents. Arguments. Stupid actions which could have ended much worse than they did. The universe conspired to send me a more direct message – an instant headache on drinking alcohol.
Even then I resisted.
For about 5 years I worked on my subconscious beliefs around my drinking habits. During those 5 or so years I toyed with the idea, but it wasn’t until that one day when I crossed an inner line, that I took the dive. I jumped off the cliff and I gave up alcohol.
And I stopped drinking alcohol completely for 2 years.
But then, I drank again. Less often and much less quantity. But I allowed alcohol into my life again.
So that’s a disclaimer. Alcohol isn’t easy to kick out of our lives forever but we need to be sure that we aren’t letting it rule us. or kill us. or ruin our relationships.
What’s most important is to have liberation from the ties to alcohol. To change our mental attitude to it.
One day, maybe the mainstream majority will see it for what it is, and then giving up will be so much easier. But as things stand today, we need a lot of support to give up alcohol, partly because of the image which society attaches to drinking.
Ok, so let’s be honest – again. If we’re drinking too much, looking forward to a drink each night and not wanting to, if we think we’re addicted to alcohol, or whatever our situation – if it’s stealing our time that’s enough reason to want to change the way we view it.
Because you don’t just ‘give up’ alcohol from one day to the next. It isn’t that easy to change a lifetime of subconscious beliefs.
Beliefs about how important, cool, fun, vital for confidence, amazing for sex, super for communicating, alcohol really is to us. And deep down we believe we don’t want to be without it.
So it takes a lot of work to change those subconscious beliefs.
I gave up alcohol with the help of the alcohol experiment with Annie Grace, author of The Naked Mind.
I would 100% recommend joining the alcohol experience for anybody who wants to reframe their relationship with alcohol. It’s completely free and full of awesome support.
By joining, you’re immersing yourself amongst a group of people who share some of your experiences and are also shedding their old ways to embrace new ones. And that’s incredibly powerful.
The alcohol experiment’s just one month of exploration into your own relationship with alcohol.
You can do it just for a month and then decide if you want to take it further or not. Maybe your goal is just to do a dry January (or any month of the year!) It isn’t a ‘give-up-alcohol’ type of program.
No, it’s a have-fun-exploring-who-you-really-are type of program.
And you’re immersed in an awesome group of supportive peers who are also on a similar path as you are so you can pick up tons of tips on how to give up alcohol.
And even though I now drink alcohol again, I’ve divorced the big A.
I divorced A all those years ago with the help of Annie Grace and her team, and over time I’ve come to a truce.
I can be in the same room together with A. We can even share a dinner together. But I’m not going to fall for his lies again. I’m not going to fall in love with the rosy-coloured bullshit that he spins me.
Never again.
I’m done.
And that’s about it. That’s how I know what it’s like to give up alcohol.
Because I’ve divorced him even though I find myself letting him in sometimes.
Is Giving Up Alcohol Worthwhile?
In a word: yes.
Now let’s get one thing straight. We all have a different relationship with alcohol. It may be seductive, abusive, sublime, reticent or complicated.
There’s nobody who can get into our head or walk in our shoes, or see through our eyes. There’s literally nobody who can know what alcohol has cost us.
Except me for me.
And you for you.
No matter what the truth behind that question, if there’s any reason for you to begin to think of giving up alcohol, you know enough. You can be sure that it’s already cost you some.
And if that’s the case, the only way for peace of mind is to cut him out of your life completely.
No, don’t feel that it’s a shame. Don’t open the door that tiny little crack, thinking he’ll behave this time. You know he doesn’t behave, you’ve got enough proof already, so why invite him in?
The truth is, you have to be completely free before you can even think of opening up the connection at all. Once you’re truly out of love with this guy, then you can let him mow your lawn, maybe.
And to be honest, for some of us, once divorced it’s better to stay that way.
And when you get to that stage, OMG it’s worth it.
You might even ultimately end up without even letting him step inside your house, who knows. I guess it depends just how much damage he’s caused you.
And wherever you draw the line, you know what would be awesome?
To be free, you know?
What We Gain When We Break Off Our Relationship with Alcohol
Depending on how much alcohol we’ve been drinking, we may experience all or some of these benefits of giving up alcohol.
Improved liver function – habitual drinking stresses and damages the liver. Changing our drinking habits gives our liver (and other organs) the opportunity to recover.
Reduced bloating – long term drinking can cause our bodies to retain liquid and give us a puffiness.
Better mental health – alcohol is a depressant which can lead to moodiness, anxiety and depression.
Reduced risk of chronic disease – alcohol weakens the immune system.
Better skin – alcohol dehydrates and ages the skin.
Reduced risk of chronic health issues such as high blood pressure, heart disease, stroke, liver disease and cancer.
Better quality of sleep – although alcohol can send you to sleep (quite often quickly), it actually disrupts the quality of our sleep, robbing the body of much needed rest.
Increased energy – improved sleep and better overall health leads to more energy
More time – we tend to dedicate a lot of time to drinking, as though it were an actual activity. When we stop, we suddenly have so many more hours in a day.
No more hangovers – say goodbye to groaning in pain as you get out of bed and you rise each morning with more energy and less heaviness.
Improved relationships – alcohol can bring out our inner chatter-box, dreadful drama-queen, sensitive-sissy or aggressive monster. We might take offence at nothing, attack an innocent (verbally or otherwise), get ourselves into a teary state over imaginary insults or just become a downright plain bore, repeating ourselves over and over again. None of which help to form healthy relationships with those we love.
More money – by choosing a special savings tin and putting some money into it each time we would normally be buying a bottle of something alcoholic, helps us to see just how much of a saving we’re making.
More joy – as we get liberated it’s like being freed from a cage.
Health Benefits of Giving Up Alcohol with Annie Grace
What Has Alcohol Cost You Over the Years?
Alcohol has cost all of us who drink too much something, regardless of whether we recognise it or not. You may or may not resonate with all of the below, but here is a list of things which alcohol may have cost you through the years.
Alcohol brings drama, takes equilibrium and breeds trouble. Here are a few things you may remember from your days of drinking.
It costs you . . .
Lots of money
Lots of time
Loss of memory
Loss of huge sections of your life memories
Arguments
Fights
Accidents
Near-accidents
Near-fatal-accidents
Your dignity
Tears
Peace
Relationships
Health
Sleep
Final Thoughts on Is it Worth it to Give Up Alcohol?
Giving up alcohol is a really difficult thing to do for most of us. Because we not only have to deal with the sugar and/or alcohol addiction, but also with all the subconscious stories we’ve built around drinking and the resistance we come up against in society as people choosing sobriety.
Most of the journey to sobriety takes place before the final decision. We may try several times before it sticks.
But ultimately, even if we don’t succeed immediately, it’s always worth giving up alcohol.
Give yourself some grace. Trust yourself. If you mess up, forgive yourself.
Get support from somebody, whether it’s online or in in real life it’s helpful to speak with people who know what it’s like to give up drinking alcohol.
Remind yourself of all the reasons you have for not drinking. Be persistent and resilient.
Is it worth it to give up alcohol? Absolutely.
If you have something to share about giving up alcohol, let us know in the comments below.
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